Okay, I admit it. I’m a fan of Coach Sue Sylvester on Fox’s Glee. Sue Sylvester, played by the actress Jane Lynch, has one goal. She wants to get rid of the Glee club because she feels it is stealing attention and money away from her Cheerios Cheerleaders. Truthfully, she wants to destroy Glee club because she is simply jealous of Will Schuester’s success in leading the Glee team. If you have never seen the show, you’re probably thinking right now, “Sounds stupid. I’ll pass.” But what takes this storyline beyond mediocre to pure good entertainment is the cast, the choice of songs, and great writing. It’s enjoyable because it follows the success pattern of old Hollywood musicals with updated humor.

But back to Sue Sylvester. In spite of the fact that she’s trying to destroy the very thing that makes this show, The Glee Club, she is completely loveable because she gets all the laughs and pokes at people in a way that isn’t mean. Here’s a few good quotes from Sue Sylvester.

Student: Hey, Ms. Sylvester, let’s get physical.
Sue: Not really my type, but I like that attitude.

Sue: My parents were famous Nazi hunters, so they weren’t around a lot.

Sue: I just lost my train of thought because you have so much margarine in your hair.

Emma: I was just wondering why Madonna is playing everywhere except my office.
Sue: You don’t deserve the power of Madonna. You have none of her self confidence, her power over her body, or her sexual magnetism. Simply put, you have all the sexuality of all those pandas down at the zoo, who refuse to mate.

Sue: As Madonna once said, I’m tough, I’m ambitious and if that makes me a bitch, that’s what I am. Pretty sure she stole that line from Sue Sylvester. No, really. I said it first.

Sue: You think this hard. I’m passing a gallstone as we speak. That is hard!

Sue: While they were in there, I told them to go ahead and yank out those tear ducts. Wasn’t using them.

Mrs. Hitchens: Who do you think I am?
Sue: That’s a very good question because I’ve forgotten both your names.

Sue: If I have a pregnant girl doing a handspring into a double layout, the judges aren’t going to be admiring her impeccable form, they’re going to be wondering if the centrifugal force is going to make the baby’s head start crowning.

Sue: I’m instating a new policy in which we play Madonna over the PA at all hours, everyday.

Sue: You may be two of the stupidest teens I’ve ever encountered – and that’s saying something. I once taught a cheerleading seminar to Sarah Palin.

Sue: You have enough product in your hair to season a wok.

Sue: You think this was hard? Try auditioning for Baywatch and being told they’re going in another direction. That was hard.

Sue: I like minorities so much, I’m thinking of moving to California to become one.

Sue: I’m going to ask you to smell your armpits. That’s the smell of failure, and it’s stinking up my office.

Sue: Iron tablet? It keeps your strength up when you menstruate.
Will: I don’t menstruate.
Sue: Neither do I.

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